Romance and Reality

Sex Education and Somatic Coaching

Welcome to Romance and Reality!

Romance and Reality connects the gaps found between mental health therapy and physical therapy to improve your quality of life.

We work collaboratively with established providers to holistically assist those recovering from anxiety, trauma, fear, and shame.

With our unique pleasure-centered approach, we can work together on achieving the communication and intimacy you desire to have in your relationship(s)!

In service to the community, we provide ethical, inclusive, and confidential care, with accessible options to fit every income.

I’m Bailey Barmettler, CSE, CSSE, CC, and I started Romance and Reality to let you know that sex doesn’t have to be a struggle!

“I highly recommend working with Bailey! She did such an amazing job making me feel comfortable and heard. Her insights about intimacy and communication with my partner were so helpful. She really wants to empower you to create the intimacy you dream of. This is a realm that often gets sidelined in relationships, but it’s so essential to address!” ~ Lisa & Joe

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Challenges We Address

Couples seeking ways to enhance their intimacy, passion, and confidence
Difficulty experiencing pleasure or desire
Recovering from sexual trauma
Empowering voice, choice, boundary-setting, and communicating authentic consent
Exploring who you are as an erotic being/ deciphering your sexual identity
Learning the anatomy of arousal
Exploring the intersection of sex and spirit
Changing habitual sexual roles or scripts
Learning the art of erotic touch/ massage for lovers
Being sexual with chronic pelvic pain, vulvodynia, or constrictions that inhibit sexual function (pregnancy, post-partum, ED, etc.)
Being sexual with a disability

Trauma-informed touch, including genital unwinding, genital mapping, & pelvic/genital scar tissue release
Experiencing & learning techniques for expanded arousal, or extended and multiple orgasms
Exploring power and surrender as aspects of sex play and pleasure

Building up basic Tantric, kink, fetish, BDSM, and other sensual knowledge and skills
Exploring erotic possibilities as a transgender person, or someone who wants to play with gender
Holistic pelvic & sexual care resources based upon current science that address physical, emotional, psychological, sexual, & spiritual wellbeing

How We Address Them

Sessions are guided by the client’s self-defined sexual wellness goals and presenting somatic states.

Progress on these goals are generally experienced within 3-6 sessions.

With a safe and trustworthy guide on how to decipher the healing and harmful patterns stored within the body’s memory (soma), we can start addressing past impediments and begin rewiring the nervous system towards pleasure.

By accessing, embodying, and empowering the body’s authentic needs, wants, and desires, profound shifts can start to be made regarding how we connect intimately with others.

As a certified somatic sex educator and Cuddlist, I am able to offer the unique option of providing safe, healing, platonic touch as a tool for your learning and healing process!

Every touch offered would be 100% optional, client-directed (at the client’s pace), and require a clear expression of authentic consent before occurring.

One way we keep our services accessible and inclusive is to provide individual or bundled session rates, as well as, affordable virtual monthly group events!

For further information, please check out these pages:

Private Sessions

Monthly Events