Trauma Awareness

Trauma can disrupt the development of healthy internal boundaries. As a result, many individuals may struggle to recognize and communicate healthy boundaries and express them

tactfully. Understanding the trauma spectrum and recognizing its signs and stages can help improve attunement to ourselves and others.

When Stimulus or Trigger Occurs:

● Fight = Anger, frustration, resistance, a clear sign a boundary is worth considering.

○ Meeting Fight with active listening could be helpful.

● Flee = Mistrust, suspicion, avoidance, rejection, hypervigilance.

○ Meeting Flee by offering to take space and then come back together could be helpful.

● Freeze = Anxiety, fear, lowered ability to word-find.

○ Utilizing non-verbal communication like hand gestures to express boundaries or the need for some space could be helpful.

● Appease/Faun = Internal confusion, where the urge to connect with the other is not in full alignment with present moment boundaries.

○ Checking in for consent more often and holding all changes of mind with gratitude and respect could be helpful.

● Dissociate = Numbness, feeling hollow, empty, detachment from the present moment/body/sense of self.

○ Prioritizing self-care and/or reaching out for therapeutic support could be helpful.

● Self-Harm = Any number of self-destructive or sabotaging behaviors/urges (ie, addictions, eating disorders, hypersexuality/hyposexuality, OCD/hoarding behaviors, self-harm, suicidal ideation).

○ Prioritizing self-care, reaching out for therapeutic support, and utilizing resources like The Suicide Prevention Hotline at #988 could be helpful.

Recognizing and reducing ambiguity around perceived power dynamics and explicitly naming the presence or absence of attractions can further foster safety and prevent triggers.